Sunday, 15 May 2011

resignation

hello thought any one out there may want a giggle so i have included my resignation on this blog for all to read i hope you enjoy it 
Dear sir/madam
  After an appropriate period of deliberation, I have come to the decision to tender my resignation from you, effective. 01-06-11
 Please know that I still maintain a high level of respect for you as a manager and colleague, and I thank you sincerely for the support and assistance you have offered me in each of those roles. I have been proud to work for you over the past six years; it has been a journey that has provided me with an unparalleled foundation to move forward to new and exciting opportunities.
 As such, I have decided to leave and become a professional ninja. It has always been a dream of mine to leave the rat race and become a professional ninja to live the life of a ninja swooping from rooftop to rooftop dispatching my enemies as I wish. I wish to take to pursuing fortune, fame, and hair-raising adventure.
As a ninja I will take my orders from no one, surprising people as I sneak in and out of rooms in my pajamas. I shall no longer walk, the ground will simply move under me. I shall no longer swim; the water will part around me. I shall be forever waiting to dispatch my enemies never sleeping just waiting. I shall make onions cry as I cut them with speed and grace. I will play minesweeper with real mines. I shall learn to speak wing dings, and know the next song on my iPod as I use shuffle. As a ninja I will not have to worry about trifling matters like bullets they will dodge me. The most and foremost skill I shall learn will be to use the 1,242 object in a room to kill someone including the room its self.
My path may not be filled with the usual comforts and technological marvels that you provide, but I shall nonetheless move forward to carve a name for myself in the books of bold insurgency and death-defying derring-do. Once I have a keen blade at my hip, I believe I will find my true calling.
 Please note that I am currently accepting applications for assistant ninja, if you are at all interested in applying. I will provide a full medical and dental plan, which will offer immediate coverage of all normal medical problems other than seppuku and the occasional bout of stabbing.
Sincerely matt

1 comment:

  1. Well done. I have long felt that this family needs to acquire more diverse skills and interests and hope you will pass on your ninja skills through home education to Rosie, Isaac and Kez. Please do nor share these talents with Sam, he is annoying enough already, and Sophie is a woman and is therefore invulnerable to most ninja attacks, being blessed with the ability to fold her arms, glare witheringly and say 'Oh, for goodness sake...'We look forward to tales of an organic farming, eco-friendly, dog loving ninja. One of a kind, we think.

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